El miedo, una cárcel invisible.

Muchas personas nos consultan sobre cómo ser feliz, o sobre cómo resolver determinado problema, cuestión que ha sido motivo de otros post, pero que no está ajena a estos malestares generales que nos aquejan en nuestra cotidianeidad.

Históricamente, muchas personas e instituciones han girado en torno a estas cuestiones y han erigido columnas de poder en torno a un conocimiento liberador que ellos poseen, capaz de proporcionar la facultad de liberar de los malestares existenciales, claro, siempre a cambio de aceptar ciertas normas a través de las cuales de algún modo quedamos dependiendo de otros. Estos “otros” son los intermediarios, a quienes introyectamos como modelo en nuestra estructura psíquica, como norma, y aquí señoras y señores es donde damos lugar al principal clivaje de nuestra personalidad. El referente en quien confiamos nuestra suerte, que puede ser una persona, filosofía o religión, se convierte en voz interior, “esto sí, esto no”.

Ser o no Ser… nadie que tenga miedo puede ser, por qué Ser implica enfrentar cada instante como si fuera nuevo, implica abrirse a la experiencia enfrentando la realidad y acobijándose en ella con sus MULTIPLES caminos y posibilidades. Claro esto solo es posible si no existen miedos que nos atormenten. Cuando se aceptan las “reglas de otros” como único camino a la liberación en realidad lo que estamos tomando es un camino único, arbitrario ya que la dualidad mental no permite aceptar algo distinto y mucho menos opuesto a lo que aceptamos como verdad, como camino, por lo tanto quedamos sometidos a una prisión que como toda prisión, quien se sale de las normas que allí existen, es penado cruelmente. Aquí entonces aparece una interrogante, ¿alguien puede salirse de las normas aceptadas?… existe una fuerza muy poderosa que evita que lo hagamos, El Miedo, en sus múltiples manifestaciones. ¿Existe un peor enemigo?.

¿La norma básica de la ética que postula: “mi libertad termina donde comienza la del otro” no alcanza para experimentar la existencia?…

Muchos pensaran “yo no sigo a nadie ni a ningún dogma, entonces ¿por qué si soy libre también tengo miedo?”…

Pero ¿Acaso en la infancia no existieron referentes quienes nos inculcaron sus normas? Por lo tanto, todos y cada uno de nosotros hasta no liberarnos de las normas de otros ¿no es lógico que carguemos con las limitaciones del miedo? Si, lo es… claro que es lógico.

Cada vez que nos enfrentamos a tomar una decisión, sea cual sea, desde la más simple a la más compleja, nos asaltan pensamientos que nos llevan a tomar decisiones, que en general son habituales en nosotros, por no decir ¡siempre!. Estas decisiones nos conducen a seguir la misma lógica de vida, el mismo camino que aunque creamos que es muy lineal, la realidad es que lo transformamos en un círculo donde al tomar siempre las mismas decisiones, pasamos siempre por los mismos “lugares” (experiencias), aunque los detestemos. ¿Entonces por qué lo hacemos? ¿Por qué elegimos seguir así?…

La pregunta que les hago estimados lectores es, ¿puede un niño de 3, 4, 5, 6 o 7 años tomar decisiones por nosotros siendo que somos adultos? Seguramente todos pensaron que no, y es muy lógico, pero yo les aseguro que sus decisiones las toman niños de esa edad. Esas edades que mencionamos son edades donde dependemos de los adultos, de “otros”, por lo que su influencia en nosotros es enorme y dado que estamos en esa edad construyendo nuestro aparato psíquico, el cual usaremos el resto de nuestras vidas, las normas que introyectemos a esas edades, sean implícitas o explicitas, estructuraran nuestra personalidad y por lo tanto se expresaran en nuestra conducta cotidianamente. Entonces si nos interesamos de niños en un ritual aborigen y le contamos al sacerdote del barrio o a la abuelita posiblemente nos hubieran dicho que nunca nos acerquemos a eso que es brujería, cosas del diablo y es algo muy malo, o si estábamos jugando con tierra porque queríamos hacer un jarrón de barro a los 4 años en el patio de casa y mama o papa o la abuela o cualquier referente nos veía y en vez de aprobar aquello, nos retaba por estar “sucios” con tierra, es lógico que en nuestra vida de adulto no queramos estar cerca de lugares con barro o ensuciarnos modelando arcilla, simplemente habrá una emoción de rechazo a eso y pensamientos de nuestra lógica mental que dirán “ensuciarse es feo” y cosas por el estilo por lo que uno, simplemente, ni siquiera lo intenta. ¿Saben quién toma esa decisión? Aquel niño de 4 años que estaba en el patio jugando con tierra y su mama se enojó al verla. Lo mismo pasa cuando se escuchan de niño frases como: “los ricos son malos” o “trabajar es feo” y cosas por el estilo, todo va dejando una norma dentro del niño, y más fuerte sea la conducta emocional del adulto que la expresa, mayor fuerza tendrá en nosotros.

De adultos ni siquiera lo sospechamos, pero así funcionan nuestras emociones y tendencias de pensamientos, y cuando queremos contradecirlas, aparece nuestro enemigo, “El Miedo”, ya que si contradecíamos aquello que el adulto o el referente decía, corríamos riesgo de que nos dañen o dejen de querernos, según la mirada del niño. Mayor carga emocional puso el adulto en la desaprobación de lo que estábamos haciendo o queriendo hacer, mayor es el rechazo a hacerlo en nuestra adultez ya que aquel miedo a que el adulto nos dañe o deje de amarnos sigue intacto en nuestro inconsciente sin que lo sepamos, por lo que el miedo sigue siendo el muro invisible que marca los “bordes” de nuestro camino.

¿Entonces qué hacemos?

Podemos concluir en base a lo antes dicho, que nuestros pensamientos asociados a emociones del pasado, son quienes toman nuestras decisiones, ya que al enfrentarnos a tomar una decisión lo hacemos en función a lo que consideramos mejor para nosotros, y eso se concluye en base a pensamientos asociados a emociones, o sea, a RECUERDOS, “tiempo”. Nuestros pensamientos son tiempo, pasado, y ese pasado decide por nosotros.

¿Tiene el pasado derecho a tomar nuestras decisiones actuales? ¿Pueden las conclusiones de un niño de entre 2 y 7 años servir como referente para tomar las decisiones de la vida adulta? ¿Alcanza nuestro instinto de conservación, y el respeto  a la libertad propia y ajena para tomar decisiones en el presente prescindiendo del pasado?

Podemos concluir de lo expuesto hasta aquí, que las normas del pasado en base a las cuales tomamos nuestras decisiones, fueron construidas en función al miedo que nos generó en ese pasado no obedecer, salirnos de los postulados del “otro”, (referentes familiares, sociales, filosóficos, religiosos etc.) ya que las consecuencias de salirnos o no acatarlos, eran el dolor y el desamparo.

Hoy eso que antes fue una consecuencia real (regaños, gritos, enojos, amenazas,etc) ahora es simbólica y opera dentro de nosotros como MIEDO, ya que a aquella niña, nadie la regañaría hoy en su vida adulta por jugar con barro, pero ella elije no hacerlo, existe un simbólico previo que la condiciona sin que ella lo sepa.

Volver a ser como niños, filosofía del perdón, vivir el instante, el aquí y ahora y conceptos aledaños de escuelas new age, corrientes psicoterapéuticas o filosofías sincretistas nos hacen referencia a esto, cortar la posibilidad al pasado de que tome decisiones por nosotros.

¿Cómo abrirnos a las múltiples posibilidades de la existencia? ¿Cómo ver aquellos caminos que están cerrados para nuestra visión estrecha? , ¿Cómo vivir nuestra existencia desde el cuerpo y no desde la mente que nos encierra entre el miedo del pasado y la ansiedad del futuro?

De esto estaremos tratando en nuestro próximo Post. Por ahora dejamos lo expuesto hasta aquí como material de reflexión para los alumnos del curso de terapeutas holísticos, cursos complementarios, y lectores interesados.

Hasta la próxima.

Academia Holística Logos.

www.academiaholistica.org

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